Transfer day brought every feeling I felt the day I left my
family at the MTC back again.
Missionaries from all over the mission met us at the church in
Sissonville where we had spent the previous day. We had a little testimony meeting in the
chapel. All the missionaries gave
incredible testimonies with amazing stories.
After this, they lined up all the new missionaries against
the walls. It honestly felt like an
execution. Again, I was being ripped
away from the people I learned to call family, and going to a place I didn’t
know, to do things I didn’t know how to do.
They began calling out missionaries’ names and assigning them
companions, sisters first. I was about
the fifth sister called, and lo and behold, I was assigned. It was hard, but I squared my shoulders, and
went to hug my new companion. And so it
began.
We were assigned to the Ashland, Kentucky South area. It’s a city, but a poor city. Driving there I got to drive through West
Virginia, Ohio, and Kentucky. We live in
a little apartment next to Blazer High School.
My companion’s name is Sister Boldrin.
She was homeschooled and loves musicals and singing and dancing. As President Pitt would later say, we are
“polar opposites.”
On our first day together we met the bishop, and had dinner
with the ward mission leader and the two other sets of elders in our ward. I had never felt so overwhelmed in my
life. It only got worse when, after
dinner, we went to visit a new investigator named P----. The missionaries had never officially met
with him. We sat down on his porch and
began talking about what we each believe.
(Side note: Porch sitting is a
big deal around here. EVERYONE has a
porch with some chairs and maybe a swing and there is a great deal of porch
sitting that goes on. Also a lot of
porch smoking! It feels like almost
everyone smokes here.) Anyway, this man,
P----, was extremely firm in his beliefs and called us heretics because we
believe we can become like God. The
lesson went awful, and I was terrified.
As we left he said to Sister Boldrin that there was something in her
eyes that he thought was special even though he thought we were wrong. Then he looked at me and said, “I’m not one
to be mean, but I just don’t see that in you.”
What a way to start my mission! When we got back in the car I broke
down. I cried so hard I think Sister
Boldrin was freaked out. I felt hopeless
in a way I had never felt hopeless before.
Now I know that you know this... but it cant hurt to say it. Feeling, like you are not good enough or like you don{t have what you need to be a missionary... those feelings are not from Heavenly Father. You know that you are where He wants you to be and that you can do whatever He wants you to do. Fear is from Satan and he wants you to feel it all the time. You for sure have what it takes. If I did it, ANYONE can do it. You stay strong.
ReplyDeletePS those brown shoes are so cute. I love them!